With that said, Matthew turned around and left.
Over the next few days, Clarissa was still in a daze. The sudden change felt surreal to her until she realized the differences. Since then, no one ordered food delivery to her doorstep. The man no longer showed up unexpectedly in front of her house or pestered her unceasingly. Only then did it struck her that everything was over indeed.
“Clarissa?”
Beside the woman, Justin called out to her as she stared into space.
His voice broke Clarissa out of her trance. Embarrassed, she gave him a half-smile.
Rubbing the bridge of her nose, she stood up and said apologetically, “I’m sorry, director. I need to go to the restroom.”
Justin nodded in acknowledgment, and she walked out of the production room to freshen up.
After pulling herself together, she came back and saw Justin puffing away at a cigarette outside the production room.
“Director, I’m sorry about…”
Justin gave her a reassuring smile. “It’s okay. I can tell that you’re not your usual self these days. Did you fight with Matt?”
Pressing her lips together, Clarissa shook her head. Her expression fell right away.
“We broke up.”
In disbelief, Justin raised his brows at her words.
She gave him a firm nod. “It’s true. I haven’t seen him for some time. I’ll go back to my hometown when everything in D City is settled.”
Justin could not believe his ears.
After a moment of silence, he said, “Maybe it’s not such a bad thing.”
Clarissa gave him a rueful smile upon hearing that. The two then sauntered to the other side and took a seat.
“Actually, Matt really likes you. Is there a misunderstanding between you and him?”
“No, it’s not because of that. I’ve already found out what happened previously.”
“Why did you still break up with him then?”
The woman fell silent at his question.
“It’s alright if you’re not comfortable talking about it.”
“No.” Pausing briefly, she continued, “I just feel that he and I are worlds apart. To be honest, I’m really afraid of losing the person I love. If I know that it’s not going to work out between us, I’d rather let it go. I’m so sick of being dumped. As the saying goes, ‘once bitten, twice shy.’ I never want to go through the same feeling again, so it’s better not to get into a relationship if there’s a risk of getting my heart broken again. You might find it hard to understand, but that’s one thing I can’t get over with.”
Losing more than what she could bear had somehow impacted her personality in ways which no one else could see.
Whenever she got into a similar situation, her trauma would always get the better of her, and she would dread being abandoned again.
Other than herself, no one else could be in her shoes. Even if she opened up and poured her heart out, others would only advise her to be courageous or overcome her fear. Peoples never really knew how it was like until the same thing happened to them. Their advice was merely words that didn’t help.
“That’s not the only problem between him and me. It’s important to have a matching social status as well. Otherwise, the previous incident wouldn’t have happened. Besides, I take many practical factors into consideration, like our future, marriage, and compatibility. How many of us get married solely out of love? Most people put compatibility and practicality first. And I’m just an ordinary person like them.”
“If so, shouldn’t you choose Matt? He’s a wealthy and eligible bachelor.”
Clarissa smiled. “There’ll be no turning back once I get into a wealthy family.”
“So you’re actually a very rational woman.”
She shook her head. I’m not sensible enough, or else I wouldn’t be as disheartened as I am now.
Deep down, she knew that it would be difficult to find a man who could live with her according to the way she wanted.
Besides, she doubted that she would ever fall for anyone else after being with a man like Matthew.
But she didn’t share these thoughts with Justin.
Hearing her words, the man gave it some thought before he replied, “Can I conclude that you find no sense of security when you’re with Matt?”
Clarissa froze for a second, then let out a laugh. “Yeah, I guess so. I feel insecure, and he can’t give me the sense of security which I need.”
The conclusion sounded simple, but her mindset was as complicated as it could be.
“Alright, let’s drop the subject. Shall we get back to work?”
Later on, Justin sent out a recording of their conversation after Clarissa left.
A few minutes later, his phone rang.
A grin appeared on Justin’s face as he said, “Matt, I already did what I could to help. Listen to the recording and think of ways to make Clarissa feel secured.”
In a deep voice, Matthew replied, “I’ve nothing to do with her anymore.”
“Tsk! Ignore what I said then. Just delete the recording. Don’t even bother listening to it.”
Matthew remained quiet.
“Matt, you know what, I’m making a movie now, and it has exceeded the budget very much. So…”
That was his ultimate purpose.
“Got it.”
Before hanging up the phone, Justin added, “I’m just saying. You can choose to ignore me if you want, but I feel that Clarissa may be having some kind of psychological problem. Needless to say, everyone else more or less has it too. As for Clarissa, her condition seems to aggravate when certain things happen. Perhaps you need to keep an eye on her or consult a psychologist.”
There was still no response from the other side of the line.
After hanging up, Justin whistled cheerfully on his way back to the studio. “Director, why do you seem so happy after smoking?” the crew asked.
“That’s not it. I’ve asked for more funds from the investor, so now our budget is sufficient for the production and publicity.”
“Wow! Director, you’re the best!”
Justin’s eyes gleamed, and he replied, “Not really. We’re just lucky to have a generous investor. Okay, cut the nonsense and hurry…”
…
At night, Clarissa was having a video call with her grandmother while eating dinner. When she was talking about her work, she brought up the TV series and the movie, as her grandmother had no idea what she was actually doing. The only thing Catherine knew was that her granddaughter had earned a lot of money by writing novels.
Hence, Clarissa shared about the adaptation of her novels into a TV series and a movie. The TV series would be released soon, while the movie would be premiered after the new year. Other than wanting to make her grandmother proud, she mentioned her achievements to cheer her grandmother up because Catherine had been feeling upset and about her breakup with Matthew.
Sure enough, Catherine was overjoyed at the news. Not only did her granddaughter make a fortune, but her novel had also been made into a TV series and a movie as well. She was already planning to show off in front of Jenny.
After the call, Clarissa still felt perturbed. Turning her laptop on, she logged into her Twitter to check the messages from her readers.
She had not been active for quite some time. Though the readers were looking forward to the TV series and movie, they actually preferred that she continued writing.
It’s been a while since I last wrote something. As for the article about the corporate world, I’ve only written the introduction. It’ll be such a waste if I give it up.
Calming herself down, she started writing again.
After all, this was her primary job.
Later, she met up with Yael to discuss her writing plans. Ever since she terminated her contract with Twilight Company, countless companies and websites sent her invitations to join them. She had discussed with Yael and decided that they would choose one of the websites to publish her articles. However, there were still some issues as she wanted to retain her copyright. Yael was already handling the negotiation, which was progressing well, and Clarissa felt relieved to put her in charge of it.
When the two were done discussing, they had a meal together.
As Clarissa was eating, she hesitated for a while before she finally steeled herself and asked, “Yael, I broke up with Matthew, so if you wish to stop working for me, you may leave anytime you want.”
Yael raised a brow while staring at the woman in front of her. “What does your breakup have to do with my job? We’ve signed a contract of employment.”
Clarissa froze for a second, and a smile broke across her face. “You’re right, Yael. Thank you so much.”
The woman’s expression remained nonchalant. “Mr. Tyson only introduced us to one another. My job is not affected by the change in your relationship. Anyway, I actually admire you for breaking up with him.”
The corner of Clarissa’s lips twitched. “Don’t you think that I’m the one who got dumped?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
Clarissa couldn’t help giggling. “Does Matthew look like someone who would get dumped?”
“No, he doesn’t. But when he’s with you, he does look like one. You made the right choice. He’s not a great match for you.”
It was the first time someone supported her decision. “Thank you, Yael.”
“There’s no need to thank me. That’s your personal affairs, after all. However, I support your decision. I believe a woman can fend for herself without depending on a man. Even if we do need a man, it’s only to satisfy our biological needs. Besides, the adult toys available in the market now are so advanced that they last even longer than most men do. That’s why I don’t understand why men even exist in the first place. Is it for procreation? I don’t think that’s necessary. A woman doesn’t need to give birth to prove herself…”
Yael babbled on while Clarissa stared at her with wide-eyed surprise.
Is there such a thing?
Naturally, everyone had the right to choose the kind of life they want, so she had no comment about Yael’s views. She just felt a little surprised.
“Am I right?”
“Yes, Yael, you are.”
“So what’s the point of getting upset about breaking up…”
Clarissa flashed a smile as a sense of warmth washed over her.
Is this a different kind of moral support?
“Isn’t that Clarissa?”
Yael and Clarissa turned their heads around in unison and saw two women walking toward them.
One of them was Helen, while the other woman was her classmate too, whose name she forgot. The only thing Clarissa could recall about her was that she carried a branded handbag wherever she went. It was her habit to trace her fingers over the bag from time to time.
The two women were unusually thrilled to run into her, apparently gloating over something.
Helen kept her expression somewhat indecipherable, but Patricia, the woman with the luxury handbag, had her thoughts written all over her face.
“It’s you, Clarissa. Why are you still in D City? I thought you would be too embarrassed to stay here. But now it seems like I’ve underestimated how brazen you are. Hahaha.”
